@A MySpondylitisTeam Member, and Beth3, you are so right, frustrating, he would have to walk in my shoes for a week to understand. You work all day, bless your heart, I don't know how you do it!! And then getting the children to activities, all shopping, cleaning, cooking. That is amazing.
Emotional support and compassion are needed with us.
Cooking, use the crock pot, or make preparations for dinner in the morning, that way I don't have to stand at 6pm.
Glad to hear you are not working, I see a therapist as well, so very helpful and healing 💜
I have to give my spouse credit for hiring a cleaning lady and buys my dinner on Friday nights.
I have to agree, unhappy adds to our health issues. God does not want us to live in abuse, I looked into moving out, I need so much help and the paperwork for Government funded Elderly communities is no fun. I have even look at various apartments. My husband has gotten control of his temper, every now and then he goes off.
I agree, life is too short to be unhappy. God would like us to be happy. 😉
Blessings, love and prayers
@A MySpondylitisTeam Member

Mentioned Users

A MySpond...

A MySpond...

I have been married 49 years , I have had strained moments but we are retired now.You learn to adjust to each other.

My husband has a problem with my food plan. I have multiple health conditions.

I have Wilson’s gene I am on a low copper food plan.

My husband does complain about all the things I cannot eat.
I had Bariatric Surgery in 2007 & some of my protein sources have been removed.

A year ago I decided to go gluten free.
Great idea takes away your craving for bread.

A month ago I took lactose out of my diet.
My goal was to have less mucus. I have accomplished a lot less mucus.

As my back problems and pain have increased over the years my spouse, sister, and kids have grown to have a greater appreciation for what I can no longer do! They understand and are very supportive. Not so much in the very beginning. I think what really gave them more awareness was a trip to Cuba a few years ago. We were in a large group hitting all the historical spots. That required a lot of walking. I had to sit down about every 300 feet or so (even in severe pain at that point). Sitting for only about 2 minutes the pain would go away. Then I could resume. But it meant either slowing down the group or trying to catch up. My sister was amazed at how well I actually did.

Now, 7 years later, I could not even do that anymore. Walking 30-40 feet, and sometimes less, brings on pain that brings tears to my eyes it is so intense. Again, the only relief is sitting down in a straight back chair. I am lucky that driving gives me no pain!!

Today, another symptom popped up. I usually have a deep heavy aching pain on my right side (lumbar) and an occasional sharp stab on my left. Now, I have the deep pain on both sides which manifests with every step I take. Right step, right side pain, left step, left side pain.

I am having an ablation in a couple weeks but I need to let the doctor know about the new development so he can address it rather than just the right side which is planned.

Thanks for listening to me drone on but it's nice to have open and like minds to commiserate with.🥰

My husband wasn't supportive at first but after seeing the pain and problems I go through he's with me 100% and I can't tell him enough how grateful that he is. Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend 😊

Beth, thanks for sharing. And I am sorry to hear you have had to go through this. We all need strong support and understanding. My wish for you is that your husband begins to truly understand or that you find the support you deserve from somewhere.